The Masquerade
by Aspect
Summary: "His eyes are ice that she doesn't think she can thaw, his face so indifferent that she doubts even the smallest smile could arise; his heart so shattered that she wonders if the pieces aren't simply too jagged to even grasp." - Set towards the end of S2
1. Chapter 1

**I just couldn't stay away! Like the summary says this little one-shot is set right at the end of Season 2, this scene cropped up when I read that next season there will be a Masquerade Ball and I've been toying with the idea ever since. To place this scene into context with what I have in mind: Damon ended up working for Katherine in order to gain some measure of her trust because he believes this is the only way to kill her. He doesn't tell anyone about his plan and Elena is furious and hurt when she believes he's chosen to go back to Katherine. Stefan and Elena's relationship has been strained since Founders Day. **

His eyes are ice that she doesn't think she can thaw, his face so indifferent that she doubts even the smallest smile could arise; his heart so shattered that she wonders if the pieces aren't simply too jagged to even grasp. It twits something within her. Suffocates. _This_ is his mask and _god_ does he wear it well.

She'd felt his eyes on her first. Felt the familiar tingle as it spread all over her body like an electric current in waves. The hairs on the back of her neck prickled and her pulse danced erratically as she fought the urge to shudder. It was always this way, her body experiencing total disconnect with her mind and lately – lately she couldn't even bring herself to _care_.

There was something wildly enigmatic about losing her identity; about wearing an ornately decorated mask with an equally elaborate dress as she moved slowly through the crowd. She couldn't _see_ him but she knew he was there. There with the hundreds of people crowding the grandiose ballroom; names without faces, faces without names and all the while she searched. Her eyes wandered over countless figures looking for his expensive taste. Looking for the elegant lines of the designer suit she was sure he would be wearing.

_No, this one's too short; brown hair not black; not the right jaw line… _

She slipped past them all, faltering only when a _too_ drunk couple had swayed dangerously on their feet blundering into her path clumsily. _No_, this wouldn't do. She needed to be higher and she strode with purpose to the dizzyingly spectacular marble staircase, ascending it unnoticed by the abundant crowd.

She was alone as she wandered to the balcony favouring the left tier over the right, there was something exciting about it; something that felt distinctly like she was breaking the rules and for once in her life she embraced it. She stepped through the shadows the noise of her heels treading white marble the only sound disturbing the peace. It was magnificent as she leaned over the banister taking in her surroundings; the high ceiling embellished with golden details, the seemingly endless expanse of marble flooring cutting intricate designs across the floor, the blood red drapery framing the grand Georgian style windows… it took her breath away she was losing herself in the extravagance of it all.

It was as her eyes surveyed the dancing figures beneath her that they finally landed upon _him_. She froze instantly and he turned slowly his gaze immediately travelling upwards until they locked with hers. It was electric. It was dangerous, inclement and it made her feel _alive_.

He excused himself from his present company easily, his feet already carrying him away and before she knew it he was emerging from the shadows beside her; that familiar swagger as he walked. _God she'd missed him_.

Her mask was golden. Golden with black beading and feathering, her lips tinted a deep and lustrous shade of red but there was no mistaking her. _No_, not this time. His was simple; black and Elena wondered why he'd even bothered because _no one_ could mistake those eyes.

She wanted to say thank you. She wanted to bridge the chasm that _she'd _placed between them since Katherine had returned. Wanted to tell him that had he just _told_ her what he was planning she'd have done anything to help him. _Anything_ - but it was too late now. They'd both done things, both said things to hurt the other and she feared that the damage was too great. The words wouldn't come. They never _did_. She didn't know what to do and it drove her crazy.

It had only been yesterday that she'd learned of his true intentions, his intentions to kill Katherine. It had only been yesterday that she'd realised that all of it had been a front. _Everything_. He'd never gone back to her; he never wanted to – he fucking _hated_ her. She'd never felt more ashamed than she had when he'd approached her at the boarding house, unable to stand her disapproval any longer. He'd thought she _trusted _him, he'd let her in and she'd blown it. Big time. Her desperate tears hadn't been enough, her heartfelt apologies either. In fact none of it was because the facts remained the same; at the end of the day she belonged to his brother. They _both_ did. Her _and_ Katherine and it _killed_ him inside.

"You know she's probably here; won't this blow your cover?" Elena whispered quietly turning her face to once again study the ball beneath them. She couldn't bear to look at him, to see the mirth in his eyes and she knew that this time. This time he really meant it.

"Been there, done that…" he replied nonchalantly and she snapped her head back her eyes going wide in alarm.

"She knows you've been playing her?" she bit out tersely thoroughly expecting Katherine to pop out of the shadows at any moment with a stake for the both of them.

"Apparently she overheard our little… _conversation_, last night" he said, his eyes trailing the expanse of tantalizing skin that was on display.

"…And she just let you leave? Just like that?" she probed dubiously. He inclined his head and laughed the sound bitter and short making her want to shiver with its coldness.

"No. She'll have her revenge, you can count on that" he answered darkly, his eyes flashing something dangerous and foreboding and Elena slumped slightly, leaning on the banister for support.

"I _am_ sorry you know…" she began tentatively after a moments pause only to be cut off by his harsh response.

"Save it. You mistake me for someone who _cares_" he snapped quickly not missing the way she visibly flinched at his words. She deserved that, she knew she did and that's why she let his comment slide, granting him that small victory but his words still cut her.

It wasn't true, he _did_ care; he wouldn't be standing there if he didn't but he wasn't ready to admit that, he wanted to see her squirm. Just for a while longer; didn't want her to know that at this point he was fairly sure that he would never be able to just walk away. Even if she wanted him to, he would never leave her. Not really.

He was feeling uncharacteristically nostalgic tonight; something to do with the ball, the costumes, the atmosphere vibrating with excitement and _life_. It reminded him of his time spent in Europe, wooing ladies of the upper class with his easy charms and god worthy looks; playing on their hidden desires – the ones that went against their carefully constructed projections of purity before sucking them dry.

She was radiant, _stunning_. He wanted to break her; consumer her. He wanted her to feel just a fraction of the things she caused within him. It was maddening yet he just couldn't help himself from coming back for more.

She sighed sadly, looked down at the floor where the soft fabric of her dress met the marble and wished that she could take her actions back - it wasn't for the first time either. She steeled herself slightly; she was stronger than this.

"Please Damon…" she began and he quirked his head to the side studying her.

"Please _what_?" he asked, taking a step closer entering her personal space one slow inch at a time.

"I need to make this right" she whispered, finally finding the courage to raise her eyes to his.

"Make what right?" he probed a ghost of a smirk playing at the corners of his lips. She bit down on her frustration, of course he wasn't going to make this easy, when did he _ever_ make things easy for her?. Elena did not relish the prospect of grovelling but if that's what it took…

"Us" she cried her voice strangled and cracking with _too much_ emotion. The smirk died before it had even flourished and Elena could just tell by the slight narrowing of his eyes that he was frowning, even though his mask concealed it. She was struck with the sudden realisation that in a way this was _easier_. This way she didn't have to _see_ the betrayal written across his features, didn't have to _see_ the turmoil she caused him - not on his face at least but Elena was fairly sure that she still saw it swimming within the cerulean depth of his eyes.

"There _is_ no us Elena. You've made that abundantly clear; and on more than one occasion" he spoke calmly and was that… bitterness she detected in his tone?

"What if I was wrong? What if I didn't mean it?" she continued defiantly closing the small space between them, her tone edgy; just a _little_ desperate but she had to get through to him. She_ had_ to. He shook his head.

"It doesn't matter. You can't change the past. You and I both know that" he placated; his tone was too tender for her liking, full of resentment and longing and it stuck her to the core causing the first bout of moisture to well in her eyes.

"But what if I change the _future_?" she tried, her voice so strangled by the lump in her throat that it made her hoarse the sound foreign to her own ears. He scoffed and it stung like a physical slap; caused the first teardrop to fall from her lashes leaving a trail behind her mask before reappearing on her lower cheek and finally falling to the ground. He heard it hit; like the fresh sound of raindrops and it burned like a bullet to the chest but he'd never say that. She'd never know.

"You don't want me to stay but you can't let me leave. You say you don't want me but I'm _not_ _allowed_ someone else. You say you love Stefan yet you're standing with_ me_. What will it be Elena? Because I am _done_ playing games" he hissed his face now just a fraction of an inch from hers and he saw the way she shivered as his cool breath hit her face.

"I…" she whispered, the words failing to reach her lips because all she could see was Damon. All she could feel was _Damon_. His lips, level with her eyes…

"You _what_, Elena?" he probed his voice falling an octave lower and the familiar feel of goosebumps erupted all over her skin. She trembled and somehow they were moving; moving towards the elaborate pillar that helped form the archway of the balcony and she gasped softly as her back hit the cool surface. There was no-where left to hide, his hands pinned her in resting upon the wall either side of her face as his eyes delved into her very _soul_.

"Damon" she whispered completely aware that nothing more eloquent would fall from her lips in this moment. Her eyes were heavy lidded and her mind sluggish as she struggled to find reasons for why this was _wrong _but she couldn't because everything was right.

"_Elena_" he mimicked and it was his _voice_ that made the decision for her. It was the fact that her name literally sounded like a dying mans prayer on his lips. It was the fact that she'd never heard that much emotion conveyed in one word from _anyone_. The fact that her heart had stopped for several beats in her chest and when it finally resumed it's natural rhythm, thundering hard and overcompensating for her brains momentary lapse of instruction, she'd found that her lips were on his.

Their hands moved at once, grabbing at each other roughly; any place they could find. Their tongues battled for dominance and she moaned into his mouth. He'd nip her lip and she'd kiss him harder, press herself closer as if she were trying to fuse her body to his and nothing, _nothing_ had ever felt more exquisite than this. It was angry. It was passionate. It was bruising. It was everything Elena had ever felt towards him and _more_. This kiss was for _her_. It had _always_ been for her.

He bunched up her skirt, the white silk slipping up her legs easily and the moment he lifted her, her legs wrapped around his waist. She groaned at the contact, clumsy hands fumbling before ripping his mask from his face. She came up for air her chest heaving, lips swollen and smudged red and he returned the gesture her mask landing right beside his, discarded on the floor both figuratively and literally speaking.

Dishevelled tendrils of chocolate brown framed her face, her cheeks flushing pink and he was sure in that moment that he'd never seen anything more enticing than her. She was hypnotic. Their frenzied movements stilled, his hand moving of it's own accord to travel it's well acquainted path down her chin; ghosting her lips as she held her breath in anticipation. The next kiss was tender; _slow_. So full of promise and longing that it broke her heart. The surge of emotion; it was _too much _and she grabbed his face intent on showing him just how deeply she cared, _loved_ into that one kiss. As if concentrating on that feeling would somehow telepathically let him know, let him know the words that she just wasn't ready to say out loud. Not just yet.

And then their momentary escape was shattered with one cruelly delivered sentence.

"Well, well, well. What _do_ we have here?"

_Katherine._


	2. Chapter 2

**Due to the number of requests to turn this one into an actual story rather than a one-shot I've decided to continue. I don't know how long this will be, I'm still working out a potential plot for it but I do have the next 2 updates planned out in my mind, I just need to find the time to write them. Thank you all for your amazing reviews, I wouldn't have found the inspiration to continue this without them! And Thank you to Nia and Natalie for reading over this one before I published it and giving me feedback about it :) I hope you enjoy it! **

One second she was pinned against the wall, Damon's firm body pressed deliciously against hers and the next? Well she was nothing. She was standing there alone starring dazed at the empty space before her, her tingling and moist lips the only indication that he'd even been to visit her, that yes they had really kissed. Katherine was gone too, like a ghost - if you blinked you'd miss her but her presence always remained, like an arctic breeze; frigid and cold.

Elena shivered violently before smoothing out her crumpled dress and stepping forwards with determination, it was only when her heel caught on something that she paused, looking down at her feet in confusion. _Their masks_.

She stopped and stared at them, struck by the prefect way in which they had landed, intertwined and she swallowed the lump that had suddenly clogged up her throat. It felt like a sign. It felt like a fucked up metaphor for _them_; her and Damon and she had to force herself to step over them, to leave them behind. She couldn't focus on it – not yet.

She hurried down the stairs ignoring the way heads turned in her direction; brushing Caroline's slender hand away from her arm her voice fading as she walked past her.

"_Elena? Why aren't you wearing your mask?"_

She ignored it all as she pushed her way through the crowd, not really sure of where she was going just sure that she had to get to Stefan, she had to let him know _she _was here.

"Stefan?" she hissed at no one in particular just hoping that he'd hear her, hoping that somehow their connection would be deep enough for him to sense when she was in trouble, to sense when she needed him. It wasn't. It didn't. And then the soft glowing candlelight was extinguished with a strong and frigid gust of wind.

Elena froze and shivered violently. People gasped stilling their movements to gaze around in wonder.

She flung her body around facing the direction of the grand entrance noting that the door was still firmly shut and immediately she knew. _Katherine_. The darkness was chilling and thick and her heart pounded thunderously loud in chest protesting her fear. She took a deep breath and resumed her search, her eyes scanning desperately for Stefan.

She felt the skin prickling on the back of her neck and she stilled her movements again, held her breath, tried to focus on hearing behind her everything else fading into the background.

"_Elena_" Katherine whispered her voice so quiet and distorted that it sounded like the wind, wispy and mysterious. She took a deep breath and spun around, ready to come face to face with the devil incarnate but instead saw nothing but thin air.

"_Over here Elena" _she teased; it came from the right this time and Elena turned her head sharply knowing before she did that she wouldn't be there.

A cruel laugh filled the room, reverberating from the cavernous ceiling and she shuddered, her hands balling so tightly that she wondered if her fingernails would draw blood.

"Stop it!" she bit out tersely, her entire body trembling with pure fear and adrenaline.

"_Poor little Elena_" she continued, and it was closer this time. She felt the shift in the air as Katherine stalked around her, too fast for the human eye to trace.

"I said STOP IT" she cried, forgetting the fact that she was surrounded by people; people who were currently starring at her as if she were crazy. Her eyes had adjusted enough for the moonlight streaming through the vast windows to bathe the room in an eerie and shadowy luminance. The masks that had formerly been so beautiful suddenly looked deadly; imposing. It scared her as dozens of expressionless, hidden faces watched her, standing completely still in the commotion and she suddenly began to panic.

She backed away quickly, turning her back and moving as fast as she possibly could without breaking into an all out run, she kept her eyes on the floor and tried to force herself to concentrate on just making it out of there before she hit something solid, her scream never leaving her lips as a hand clamped over her mouth tightly.

She struggled against the figure desperately as she was dragged towards an area that the moonlight couldn't reach the panic raising with every passing second as she was plunged into the abyss. She bit down on her attackers hand, hard enough to draw blood and tried to pull them both to the ground using the little weight that she had.

"_Ow!_ Easy, easy it's _me_ Elena. It's Damon, you're safe" he spoke into her ear and she stopped struggling immediately, the sudden gush of air tickling his hand signalling her relieved sigh.

"I'm gunna let you go; don't scream" he instructed a hint of annoyance detectable in his tone before the hand slowly dropped from her mouth; delicate, almost caressing. His arm which was tightly secured around her waist loosened slightly before dropping slowly, his fingertips lingering a little too long, a little _too _lovingly on the curve of her hips as she focused on trying to still her thundering heart.

Elena turned slowly in the very little space between them, the heavy shadowing preventing her from seeing his features clearly.

"What's going on?" she mumbled urgently her voice barely rising above a strangled whisper.

"We need to leave" he deflected easily ignoring the way she frowned with annoyance.

"I'm not leaving! Not without Stefan" she countered and he rolled his eyes. Right how could he forget?

"Stefan can take care of himself you however, cannot. Move" he instructed, his tone clipped leaving no room for argument as his hand circled around her upper arm forcing her to obey him.

"Wait!" she huffed desperately even as she followed his movements, tripping slightly on the length of her dress. "_Damon!_" she hissed angrily, trying with no avail to remove her arm from his. He continued to ignore her pathetic attempts to escape bemused that to this day she _still _couldn't accept that he was stronger than her. He would always be stronger than her, he knew better and no amount of protesting could change the fact that he'd do anything to save her life. _Anything_.

She made one last ditch attempt at freeing herself by planting her feet together firmly and tugging in the opposite direction with all of her strength.

"Elena" he spat his tone deadly as he glared at her dangerously. "I'm not going to say this again. _Move_".

She straightened up regarding him before she raised her chin defiantly.

"No"

The slight tick of his clenching jaw and the flash of rage she saw dance across his eyes were the only indication that he'd heard her and he quirked his head smirking cruelly before he responded.

"_Fine_" his tone was flippant, void of any emotion and she was momentarily confused; wary that it had been too easy, that he had something up his sleeve and she realised what it was the moment she was hauled over his shoulder.

She wanted to scream, to hit him for being so stubborn. Only he could bring out such intense feelings of rage from within. It was backwards; fucked up. He was just trying to protect her, to spare her from the bloodbath that was bound to occur but it drover her _insane_. It made her feel crazy and infatuated with the thought that he still _cared_ about her, even though she pushed him away. Even though she fought. Even though she _still_ picked his brother.

* * *

Katherine doesn't _like_ being played. She gets bored and she moves on, that's just the way she is but something about the Salvatore brothers got under her skin. The truth was that 150 years ago she'd _fled_. She'd run because she'd become too involved, too invested in what had previously been just a game. _Stefan._ Sweet, caring, dependable Stefan; it enraged her to think that she, Katherine fucking Pierce would find herself besotted with the _good_ boy. To find herself longing for his stolen kisses, the soft caresses. Maybe that's why she'd fought so hard for indifference, played games with his heart; set out to destroy Damon as a side project because she _couldn't_ be good. She couldn't accept that she'd found herself saying those words ignoring the fact that it had been so long since she'd even meant them. Regardless of the fact that she didn't think she was even capable of emotion after almost two centuries of carnage. But that was then and this was now, another century and a half later and she'd come back for more.

Stefan doesn't want her; Damon doesn't either. That doesn't mean she's above sticking around regardless; drained townsfolk left scattered here and there, a few mind games with _little Elena_, passionate trysts with the elder brother and stolen kisses from the younger – it was all good fun but she was _tired _of playing. She wanted her resolution and tonight; tonight she would get it or die trying.

It was almost funny really; she'd made it almost one-hundred and thirty _years_ without hearing the Salvatore brother's names. Without hearing a single mention of what had befallen her and her kind in the ruins of Mystic Falls. Her memories? They'd dulled thanks to the destruction and terror she left in her wake, every week there was a new city, new blood; fresh _cattle_ for her taking. She was powerful, she was everything Klaus had intended her to be and _more_; she'd forgotten her treacherous misgivings, forgotten that she _did_ have a weakness.

As for Chicago, _well_ that had been the beginning. She'd seen that girl; _Annabelle _from the far side of a club, their eyes meeting in a storm of recognition. She'd vanished before her mouth had even fully dropped in awe of her stunning betrayal but Katherine knew it was there. She'd left Pearl in that tomb to rot and hadn't dwelled about it in the slightest; wouldn't have changed a thing and she and Anna both knew that. It wasn't hard to figure out that the only way she'd escaped was through the powers of compulsion. Katherine had made it another twenty years before the past caught up with her again.

This time it was Isobel, a young woman who had stared at her in utter confusion from the far side of a busy street in Paris; and that's when she'd first learned of _her_ name.

"_Elena?" she'd whispered perplexed and Katherine had all but recoiled in disgust; she was never mistaken, especially not by her own kind – she'd noticed the lack of rushing blood, the lack of emotion in those dead eyes the second Isobel had appeared before her. _

"_Who are you?" Katherine asked, not bothering to hide the arrogance from her tone and it was then that Isobel straightened up, cocking her head to the side in fascination. _

"_You look just like her" she mused crossing her arms ignoring the threatening stance of her daughters look-a-like before her. _

"_My patience is wearing very thin" she warned grabbing the new born roughly by the throat. "I suggest you start talking" she bit out, using her speed to propel them to a secluded alley, shoving Isobel roughly against the wall. _

"_Who turned you?" she demanded loudly. _

"_Damon… Damon Salvatore" she choked out and that name… that name had been all it had taken to make Katherine freeze for the first time in centuries._

_

* * *

_

"_Please_ Damon, we don't know what she'll do to him she's angry, she…" her protests died on her lips the second she caught sight of _them_ standing beside the red fountain of punch. Even through the darkness there was no way that she could mistake what she was witnessing, Katherine's lips upon _his_. Her hand intertwined with _his_. Her mouth fell open and the beginnings of hot tears scorched in her throat and as quickly as she'd seen it, the image was gone replaced with the sight of the grand archway that lead to the front door of this grand mansion.

Damon turned upon hearing Elena's voice falter, upon hearing the way her heart had missed several beats and he found the source of her discomfort almost immediately, the frown on his face deepening as he regarded Katherine feverishly kissing his brother.

"Looks like we found Stefan, now can we go?" he quipped, not waiting for a response as he resumed their passage towards the exit and she was once again facing his betrayal, once again watching as she was carried limply out of the manor.

His lack of reaction to the utter heartbreak she was experiencing stung her almost as much as actually seeing _them_ had and she let the silence linger; as he dropped her to her feet, as she climbed with no resistance into the passenger's side of his car, as he drove them back to the boarding house. There were no words; no point, nothing could adequately express what she was feeling so she didn't even try. _Couldn't_. She doubted he would have listened to her sob-story anyway.


	3. Chapter 3

**First of all I would like to apologize for how long this update has taken, some of you may have read in my other oneshot Clarity that I've had major writers block and problems with thinking of a way to change the plot line for this to adapt to what's happened to D/E in season two and I wanted it to remain canon with everything that's going on but I've found that having Damon actually kill Jeremy just wouldn't work with the plans I had for this story so I have decided to change it and make it AU. Everything will be explained, I've just re-arranged some storylines and tweaked some lines so that it all fits and what you should know before reading this update is that Damon DIDN'T snap Jeremy's neck. He did something else and that will be revealed in this chapter, if anyone gets confused with what I've changed for this chapter then just tell me in the review and I will try to make it clearer in the next Authors note. That being said I am planning to explain things as the story goes along using flashbacks, so I can't give too much away! I think that's all I needed to cover, thank you so much for all of your amazing reviews and the comments I've received about my writing in general, they're so kind and it really means a lot! **

"Stop" Stefan whispered his voice and expression tortured as he wrenched his lips away from hers. Her presence… it was like taunting an alcoholic with a bottle of the finest vodka, he'd fought against her _everyday_. Fought for that one part of him _not_ to listen as she promised to give him everything he'd ever wanted, everything he'd died in the name of. He fought gallantly and admirably, convinced himself that she was once again playing games with them all and on some level he believed that truth, but it was _hard_. It hurt to constantly feel so conflicted, so torn. He was fragile, he'd always been fragile, always been easily led, too naïve, too trusting. Over the years he'd learnt to change that, the most leading example being his inherent mistrust of his brother but Katherine. Somehow Katherine ignited that young, innocent _boy_ from 1864 and everything had started merging into one. Every time he touched Elena he thought of Katherine, every word he exchanged with Katherine he thought of Elena. It was psychotic, fucking _infuriating_. He'd lost himself and he didn't know what to do.

"Stefan" she cooed, touching his face affectionately and he squeezed his eyes shut against the image of her angelic face. The juxtaposition was too great; it was too much. He hit her hand away roughly; the corners of his eyes darkening with barely suppressed rage.

"I said _stop_" he hissed, fangs making their presence known and she rolled her eyes, pouting and stepping away from him casually as if nothing had even happened.

"Too bad, my offers only going to stand for one more night. You need to make a choice Stefan" she spoke sweetly, picking up a glass and twirling the pinkish liquid around with morbid fascination.

"There's no choice to make Katherine. I've already made it" he responded angrily, glaring at her as he saw the corner of her mouth quirk with barely suppressed frustration. She slammed the glass down, hard enough for it to shatter and spill it's contents all over her hand as her eyes flashed murder.

"Wrong answer _Stefan_" she spat before vanishing into the night. He swallowed the uncomfortable lump in his throat as his heart thundered with anxiety, had he pushed her too far? Was this it? Was she finally going to lay all of her cards on the table, games _finally_ laid to rest? Would she really hold true on the promise she'd made months ago to end Elena and claim what she rightfully believed was hers?

He took one calming breath before letting his eyes swoop over the room. He never should have let Elena wonder off alone, it wasn't safe. If she'd have just been with him… it was easier to ignore Katherine's advances when the reason for his denial was plainly in sight and somewhere deep inside he realised that it _shouldn't_ be like that. That if his heart was truly devoted to Elena _entirely_ then the feeling of his love for her would have been _more_ than enough to stop him from kissing Katherine - _again_.

"Fuck" he hissed, dragging a hand roughly through his hair. He wasn't this person; he didn't want to _be_ this person. _Why_ was he?

* * *

Elena stormed into the boarding house kicking her heels off roughly delighting in the way they hit the old wooden floors with a loud thud. The stabbing hurt had made way for the niggling truth that she really was no better than him. She didn't have a right to feel this way because she'd just been kissing Damon irrespective of the fact that she was _meant_ to hate him; irrespective of the irreparable damage that they'd both done to their friendship since Katherine's return.

It was startling to conceive what a complete and utter tangled web of lies her life had become.

She and Stefan were officially no longer dating – but they secretly were (although she was fairly sure that Damon had never fallen for the break up in the first place).

Damon was working for Katherine – but he'd only been doing it in order to gain her trust and to try to figure out her plans.

Stefan was trying to convince Katherine that she should leave Mystic Falls. That's all he was doing when he continuously met with her to "convince her to go" – somehow Elena was sure that there was a hell of a lot more to their meetings and history than she really _wanted_ to know.

She trusted Stefan, she loves him – but she's started to doubt the strength of their relationship and their love for one-another and tonight… tonight she _kissed_ Damon.

She was in the process of making her way to the den when his words thrust themselves into her mind causing her to stop dead in her tracks.

"_You and Katherine have a lot more in common than just your looks" _

Her stomach lurched horribly and she was vaguely aware that she felt quite sick; it had hurt when he'd said it the first time but now; now it was _true_. She was playing exactly the same game despite it being unwittingly.

She honestly hadn't _meant_ to kiss him, it hadn't been a pre-orchestrated move on her part but he was there, and she was there and in that moment it just seemed so right that she couldn't; _wouldn't_ deny him any longer. Not anymore, not when she'd hurt him so much. Not with the ever impending sense that time was running out.

He sauntered in after her casually, loosening the black tie he wore with a skill and ease that only a gentlemen could hone and made his way to the drinks cabinet swiftly, one eyebrow raised.

"This house is old Elena, you should treat it more carefully" he drawled swirling the liquid in his glass before taking a long sip. The words snapped her out of her frozen stupor and she exhaled long and hard in an effort to calm her rising temper. Why could he never be direct? Why did he always have to make passing comments armed with a stinging undercurrent and double meaning. The way he'd said it; the way his words had wrapped themselves around her heart and squeezed it so tightly made her hands shake and her stomach clench in knots.

"Are you referring to the house or your feeling_s_ Damon" she asked a little more aggressively than she'd intended too and his eyes snapped up to meet hers, narrowed and accusing before he shrugged her comment off. Forced a smirk to appear on his face and scoffed at the notion.

"I don't _have_ feelings; remember?" he replied, his tone flat, cold and emotionless.

* * *

"_What are you doing here Damon?" Elena asked tiredly, rolling her eyes and craning her neck around looking for any sign of Stefan. _

"_That's no way to greet a friend" he chided easily, leaning over and stealing one of the fries from her plate before eating it obnoxiously. She rolled her eyes and pushed the plate towards him, suddenly not hungry anymore. _

"_You're right. It's not – that's why I did it" she said pointedly giving him a look that conveyed how plainly she wanted him gone. He sighed and dropped the act quickly his face becoming drawn and serious. _

"_Look, I didn't come here to fight. I came to make a peace offering…" he began before her scoff interrupted him as she turned and started to remove herself from the chair. _

"_Elena" he said, grabbing her forearm gently in order to keep her in place. She swung her face around to meet his gaze giving him a wary look before she conceded and sat back down again. He searched her eyes, troubled by how closed off and cold they seemed before he released her hand and pulled the book that he'd been hiding under the table out, placing it in front of her. She frowned and looked at it quizzically. _

"_What is this?" she asked taking the worn pages in her hands and scanning the golden letters printed on the spine. _

"_Patrova" she read, frowning. Hadn't she seen this book back at Duke? She didn't understand the significance and he sensed her confusion before elaborating. _

"_It belonged to Katherine – her original name was Katerina Patrova... I saw it engraved on a family heirloom once" he explained quietly, chewing his lip slightly trying to gauge her reaction. She looked at him as if she were assessing the sincerity of his actions before she placed it back down again, one hand resting over it almost protectively. _

"_Thanks" she said simply and he seemed to relax slightly before sending her an unsure smirk as she regarded him with a guarded and cool expression. He took a deep breath before plunging into the deep end, blindly hoping that he hadn't timed this wrong before continuing. _

"_I'm… sorry ok. It was Katherine she didn't give me a choice! It was either turn Caroline or she would have killed her and I mean really killed her. What would you have me do?" he explained exasperated, the genuine remorse shining in his features causing that never ending lump to appear in her throat before she forced it back down again. No, not this time. She couldn't forgive him for this; it was one thing after the next. Death followed him like the plague and it was her friends and her family who were suffering because of it._

"_Neither!" she hissed, trying hard not to raise her voice as a few people sitting at the surrounding tables looked over in curiosity. He clenched his jaw and tried again. _

"_I don't want this life for her! She's lost Matt, she's losing Bonnie, her Mother is bound to notice that she's stopped aging sooner rather than later; she's killing people…" _

"_So you would rather I'd killed her?" he asked, interrupting her tirade with his earnest question and it was then that the first beginnings of doubt began to creep into her mind. It was then that she began to doubt her own strength and conviction because the way he was looking at her broke her heart. It forced her to remember that god-forsaken conversation in her bedroom the night that __she'd__ returned. Forced her to remember the way he'd threatened Jeremy's life, held him by the throat against her door and threatened to turn him. It forced her to remember everything that they'd been through and everything she was about to give up on under some misguided notion of protection. She wouldn't admit that she was scared. She shook her head exasperated._

"_That's not the point and you know it. You threatened Jeremy, you had him up against my wall and you were ready to snap his neck! If I hadn't been there… If I hadn't stopped you… I just…" she trailed off shaking her head as the memory overwhelmed her; the sheer terror of realising what he was capable of doing given the right motivation. Of how deeply his rage could blind him, so deep that he'd hurt even her. She took a steadying breath and regarded him, knowing exactly what she needed to do. _

"_The answer to your question Damon is yes. Yes you have lost me forever. I can't get past this" she said with conviction, fighting the urge to flinch at the crestfallen look that drafted across his face before it changed into something else entirely, his eyes coming alight with something he'd never regarded her with before; hate and mistrust. _

"_But you already knew that didn't you? And you used me when we went to Duke… you gave me hope knowing that I'd find the information, knowing that I'd find something that you couldn't and you waited until you had it to come out and tell me the truth" he said, becoming more and more withdrawn and cold with every hard hitting word and she found that a response just wouldn't fall from her lips. _

_Her heart was pounding and she could hear the blood rushing in her ears, her limbs were trembling and god... She didn't think that doing this to him would hurt so badly but it did and she could barely breathe for the pain. _

_He stood his eyes roaming over her frozen form with absolute disgust before he spoke again. _

"_You and Katherine have a lot more in common than just your looks. Enjoy the book" he spat coldly before walking away from her, away from the Mystic Grill not even sparing her a backwards glance as she sat there, mouth hanging open slightly as she took in the precedence of what she'd just done. It was supposed to make her feel better. It was supposed to make her feel right… why did it feel like the very air had just been stamped out of her lungs?_

_

* * *

_

Elena looked down at the floor, shame lacing her features as she recalled the conversation that had _really_ started this - the animosity between them. There wasn't a day that went by that she didn't regret the path she'd chosen for them. It had just seemed so much easier at the time to lash out at him, to blame him. It was something she'd found that she _could_ control and so she'd latched onto it. She'd clung to her anger and whilst he deserved some of it, she knew that he didn't deserve _all_ of it. She knew that some of the feelings she'd been projecting onto him really had nothing to do with him at all and now... Now she barely recognised herself when she looked in the mirror. Everything she stood for, her morals, her values; she'd compromised all of them without really even knowing _why_. She didn't have that high ground to stand on anymore and she felt tarnished.

"This has to stop" she chocked out, gesturing between the two of them and he was startled by the amount of guilt he heard carried with her words. He frowned placing the glass down gently on the cabinet as she looked up at him helplessly. She looked so beautiful, standing there in his living room in a white silk gown that flowed gracefully around her and it fucking _hurt_.

He didn't know why he kept doing this; didn't know why his heart just wouldn't let go no matter how many times he told it to, no matter how many times he was rejected and it drove him _insane_.

"Why should it?" he spat angrily, latching onto every single reason that he _shouldn't _listen to her, _shouldn't_ still want her, _shouldn't _want to run his fingers through her hair and hold her to him again. Kiss her again. Make love to her. Have her saying _his_ name.

"Because! I was wrong about what I said Damon" she cried, her voice wavering horribly all over the place.

"And that's just supposed to magically change everything?" he asked incredulously, nearly choking on the hypocrisy of it all. She bit her lip so hard that she thought it might bleed in an effort to refrain from screaming at him.

"If I said I forgive you would it change anything?" she countered quietly and his face became a horrible mix of hope which was quickly replaced with hurt and confusion.

"That's not fair and you _know_ it" he said, his voice coming out a lot weaker than he'd intended as he looked at her darkly, raising his eyebrows at her in warning. He couldn't do this again; he couldn't handle the games, the manipulations, the mistrust. He _wouldn't_ put himself through that. Not anymore.

"I mean it. I think… I _know_ I can forgive you if you just give me the chance" she implored, stepping forwards to grab his hands, holding them in her palms reassuringly. "Please Damon, let me forgive you. _Show_ me that you can be forgiven" she whispered quietly her eyes searching his.

"What happened _to you've lost me forever_" he asked, the bitterness a tangible snag in his voice and she practically winced at her own words and shook her head.

"I was angry, so, _so_ angry and… I wanted it to hurt" she struggled out her voice failing her as the tears finally forced themselves to spill down her cheeks. "I wanted you to feel what I was feeling and that was the only way I knew how; it wasn't right and I'm _sorry_; but you've hurt me too and you know it. Neither of us is innocent" she continued, her tone begging him to listen to her, begging him to step away from the anger for just a second to consider her words.

The tense look that pased felt like hours as she studied his face; the torrent of emotion that was washing over it, practically praying for acceptance to be added to that list. She knew that she was holding her breath; she knew that he could hear her heart pounding in her chest, she knew that he'd be able to feel the guilt that was weighing her down and she hoped to god that it was enough. She had to convince him that this was _real_. That everything she was saying to him right now was _true_.

And finally; _finally _he swallowed tightly and nodded slightly, squeezing her hands to convey the things that he wasn't ready to say and she let out the breath she'd been holding in a relieved sigh, the fist that had been clenched around her bleeding hear releasing measurably.

"_Thank you_" she said quietly, giving his hands one last squeeze before stepping backwards slightly and letting go of them gently. She wiped her cheeks roughly and sniffed suddenly self conscious of what she looked like and she knew that it was ridiculous. _She_ was ridiculous.

He frowned rather self consciously, unsure of what to do with his hands, of what they'd just agreed to, of what had been established and he decided to occupy the awkward beat of silence with a drink as Elena excused herself to go and clean up. He was sitting in an armchair gazing into the fire, expression as complicated as ever when she returned, he noticed that the mascara that had been coating her cheeks was now gone, along with the smudged red lipstick and he brushed his fingers along his lips subconsciously remembering the feel of her supple ones between his.

"Where exactly do we go from here?" he asked quietly after she'd settled on the sofa next to his chair, mimicking his occupation with the fire and she looked at him then. Really looked at him as she considered their options, as she considered the passion that had been ignited in her chest for _him_ before she answered honestly.

"We try and start again"


	4. Chapter 4

**This season is really kicking my but in terms of giving me writers block, once again I'm sorry for the delay and thank you so much for your reviews last chapter. I'm going to change the approach and say that anything that happens in the episodes from now on won't be relevant within the context of this story unless I write it in, hopefully it will be easy to follow. Thank you for all of your feedback, I appreciate it so much more than I could ever express. **

There was a distinct lull in activity following their heartfelt conversation; Elena sat with her feet curled beneath her leaning somewhat sleepily on the firm curve of the leather sofa whilst Damon stared idly into the fire. If there was a sense of urgency about their current situation neither one of them showed it, instead they sat patiently and waited in companionable silence. She alternated between quietly studying the strong profile of his face, revelling in the way the flickering flames cast dancing shadows handsomely across his skin, to thinking that the way his lashes framed his eyes was decidedly perfect.

If he noticed the way she was starring at him he made no motion to acknowledge that fact. He was musing over her words, trying to nurse this new feeling within himself; something that felt distinctly like _hope_. He was playing with fire and he knew it but when had that ever stopped him before? He'd been burned, yes. More times than he could count; by Elena, by Katherine even by Stefan in his own way. Everyone he'd ever come to care about had turned their backs on him and he'd turned his back in return yet here he was, here_ they_ were, caught in a tangle of lies worthy of an Oscar.

He shifted his eyes to the left then, catching Elena off guard mid stare and she blushed slightly, averting her eyes embarrassed that she'd been caught and the smallest flicker of a smirk began to pull at the corner of his lips.

"I could give you a picture if you want? It would last longer" he teased lightly breaking the silence. She laughed softly and shook her head. He saw the way she rolled her eyes but didn't miss the small smile that broke out onto her features as she dipped her head in a self-conscious gesture. It floored him when he realised that somehow... somehow he'd forgotten how _good _it felt to be the one making her smile. To be the one pushing that seemingly permanent frown from her face and he latched onto the notion; took in every detail about the moment and stored it away with the intention of never forgetting what it felt like.

His newfound sense of peace was shattered barely a second later however, when his eyes caught the blur of movement alerting him to a new presence before she settled herself smugly in the vacant armchair opposite his.

"I thought I'd find you both here" she drawled lightly, crossing her legs and settling back in the chair, her arms resting regally on each sidearm as she smiled sweetly at him.

Elena gasped lightly and tensed, immediately straightening up and removing her legs from the sofa should she need to flee.

"Cut the crap Katherine" he answered coolly, remaining un-affected by her sudden appearance.

"Aww, Damon doesn't want to play anymore? But we were doing so well!" she pouted and mocked, her eyes dancing dangerously in a way the used to intrigue him.

"What can I say? I got tired. You're just not as fun as you used to be _Kathy_, is the age finally getting to you?" he said, voice dripping with false and sarcastic regret.

She scoffed hiding the flicker of unease his words and actions brought, more so because she'd honestly started to believe that he was _still_ in love with her. Vanity always had been her weakest point and she was mentally kicking herself for not realising sooner that _of course _he was capable of betraying her. The reason was sitting rigidly on the sofa between them and she wondered how she hadn't seen this coming sooner. Why she hadn't gone with her first instinct all those nights ago to send him packing… They always said old habits died hard.

* * *

"_Damon Salvatore" she drawled seductively before dropping the freshly drained body of the hiker and turning to face him, mouth still coated in the rich liquid. _

"_Katherine" he greeted easily, stepping closer to her in the small clearing amongst the dense trees that he'd tracked her too. _

"_I must say I wasn't expecting to see you so soon, you almost had me convinced that you really hate me" she teased cocking her head to the side as she approached him deftly. _

"_Oh believe me; I do" he answered, grinning easily as she stopped, her body merely inches from his; her eyes burning with barely restrained desire. Just because she'd never loved him didn't mean that she was completely blind, it was his eyes. She'd always had a thing for blue; that chiselled jaw line, those impossible cheekbones. There was never any denying that she was attracted to him - not then and certainly not now. _

"_Good; being lovesick doesn't suit you" she cooed not missing the way his jaw clenched almost imperceptibly in reflex to her comment. She laughed, the sound enveloping the silence before she continued. _

"_Are you here to kill me Damon?" she asked feigning innocence and it was his turn to smirk. _

"_Quite the opposite actually; I want a truce" he spoke confidently his eyes taking their time as he looked her up and down. _

"_A truce?" she asked, raising her eyebrows in surprise. "Elena won't forgive you? She's decided that she hates you? Is that why you're here Damon?" she mocked, intrigued when her words seemed to elicit the opposite response to the one she'd been hoping for. Instead of seeing guilt and sorrow; barely contained turmoil she saw nothing, instead of seeing hurt she saw amusement. He smirked again, his eyes meeting hers in a silent challenge. _

"_Like you said, being lovesick doesn't suit me" he replied easily, moving closer still as she studied him her eyes narrowed slightly before a slow and malicious smile broke out across her lips. _

"_Kiss me" she instructed. Her eyes never leaving his and he was damned for remembering the way she'd said those words before. _

"I'm ready. I want you to turn me"

"Kiss me"

_It was exactly the same, a dead body on the floor, alone in the woods surrounded by the darkness of nightfall, blood smeared upon her lips except this time; this time he wasn't deluded. This time he knew what he was getting into to, and this time… this time he'd come out on top._

* * *

"Pity" she replied flippantly. "You always were a good fuck, I'll miss it" she replied coldly.

Elena flinched visibly at her choice of language; she'd thought about it. About them _together _like that and it had always sat uneasily with her for some reason; made her heart burn in a way that she wasn't used to and it was just one more thing to add to the list of emotions that she felt towards him without even understanding _why_. He drove her mad, absolutely insane. He made her heart skip beats and her stomach tie in knots. When she was around him her pulse danced and her skin tingled whenever they touched, he had the unparalleled ability to just make her_ forget_ and it scared her, angered her and excited her all at the same time.

He drove her wild and she couldn't control him, he was a lose canon, a complicated canvas shrouded in darkness. It was always one step forward and _three _steps back. She'd lied to him when she'd said that there was _nothing_ between them. There'd been something from the very second she'd laid eyes on him, from the way he'd raised her hand delicately to his lips and she realises now that he must have _hear_d the way her heart skipped several beats. She'd tried to play it off as a purely physical attraction but it had become increasingly clear that it was _more _than that and then... then there was Stefan.

There had been a time where she'd honestly thought that she'd die without him. That he was her epic romance, her one true love, her soul mate, her perfect storybook tale but it's taken this long to realise that none of that is _real_. They're called stories for a reason, their cliché's for a _reason_. What is actually happening to her, to _them_ is so much grittier and unclear than those notions could ever be and she wonders why she'd even brought into them for so long.

Maybe it's because she'd been swept up in the romanticism of it, with the thought of such an epic love story between herself and the emotionally tormented vampire – hell it was practically every teenage girls fantasy. But ever since Caroline rained on her parade at Jenna's barbeque she'd been forced to look at the _reality _of her situation. She's only just turned _eighteen_! She's not even old enough to buy alcohol for herself and she's already given up every semblance of a normal life in the name of what? Her epic teenage romance that she can no longer see lasting beyond a few more months at best? It's enough to make her question her sanity. It makes her scared, it makes her hands shake and her heart clench with dread because she realises that something has to give. They can't keep going like this and she fears that this is the end for her and Stefan. In fact… somehow she _knows_ that it is. Somewhere along the way the fights had become real; the aggravation, the hurt, the inability to understand the others actions...

"It's a shame that I can't say the same for you" Damon smiled easily his tone light and carefree as he responded to Katherine, their eyes locked in a silent battle for dominance.

Katherine narrowed her eyes.

"Careful now, you wouldn't want me to do anything _rash_, would you?" she warned, her tone deadly and he was unable to stop his eyes from flickering over to Elena's form at the implication of her statement. Threat received loud and clear. He returned his eyes to Katherine's expressionless ones and schooled his features into that of indifference.

"What do you want Katherine?" he asked, there was no more need for pleasantries or witty banter. He could see the way her body rested deceptively relaxed but it was her hands that gave her away. They were tense, gripping the leather armrests, showing how ready she was to pounce.

"You know what I want Damon, I know you have the moonstone" she said, tilting her head to the side slightly as she studied his expression. He looked bored, rolling his eyes as he opened his mouth to speak.

"Actually, he doesn't. I do" Elena interrupted finally finding her voice and thankfully, it came out stronger than she'd expected. Damon's expression registered slight shock as both his and Katherine's eyes snapped to hers.

"She speaks" Katherine replied sarcastically.

"I'm not giving It to you" Elena decided firmly, raising her chin in a defiant manner that betrayed the way her body was beginning to tremble with fear. She ignored the glare that Damon was sending her way, the one that just screamed the words "_what the hell are you doing?" _at her.

"Don't push me Elena" Katherine cooed, tilting her head in a playful manner as she directed her full attention to her younger doppelganger. "I thought you were smarter than that; perhaps you need a little persuasion hmm?"

In a split second Katherine was out of her chair blurring towards her. It wasn't until her hand clamped around her throat in a vice like grip that Elena even realized that she'd moved such was the extent of her speed and not one second later the hand was gone; Katherine was thrown unceremoniously over the back of the couch and sent crashing into Damon's liquor table, the glass shattering along with the wood violently.

"You touch her again; you _die_" Damon spat viciously, using his speed to pull her up roughly before slamming her into the nearest wall listening with satisfaction as his strong grip crushed her windpipe with ease.

Elena stood shakily, peering around Damon's back to where Katherine was now slumped, long hair billowing down to cover her face as she clutched at her throat, mirroring her own stance.

"Bad idea Damon" Katherine finally seethed, her voice coming out scratchy as she waited for her throat to heal itself before standing fully, her eyes alight with anger as she met his murderous gaze.

"I could kill you right now and you know it" she hissed at him and his jaw tensed; he wasn't stupid. She was stronger than him, the he and Stefan put _together_ but if he had to die protecting Elena then so be it.

"But you won't and _you _know it" he reciprocated easily delighting when he saw the annoyance dancing within the depths of her ebony black eyes, that was the biggest physical difference between them; her and Elena. Her eyes seemed somehow darker, their depths full of nothing but ice and death.

"What makes you think you mean _anything _to me" she bit out angrily.

"I don't; but the fact that you came back to Mystic Falls, that you turned me as well as Stefan, that you're still making idle threats shows that I must serve a purpose" he replied arrogantly, looking her up and down with disdain and her expression cooled considerably, not quite sure what to make of his deduction because he was right. She gave him one measured glare before making up her mind.

"You're wrong" she said easily before picking up some of the splintered wood surrounding her and plunging it into his stomach, twisting it for effect as she watched the way he grimaced and grunted in pain.

"Damon!" Elena cried her voice high pitched and desperate. It felt the wind had just been knocked out of her lungs as she watched him slump to the floor, hand clutching at the stake.

Katherine straightened up, smoothing the creases from the rumpled silk of her dress before she addressed the frozen human as if nothing had happened.

"Last chance Elena, bring me the moonstone or Damon dies" she stated candidly before vanishing.

In the end it was his groan of pain that snapped her from her terror induced stupor and she moved towards him quickly, kneeling beside him just as he pulled the wood from his body, throwing it carelessly across the room. She winced at the squelching sound it made and at the amount of blood that was starting to pool beneath them but didn't let it perturb her from reaching out to him. Her hand cupped his face, her touch feather light as the other rested on his back unconsciously drawing smoothing circles and it was then that he remembered just how _much_ he'd missed her touch. Missed her warmth, missed the way that _knowing_ that she cared for him made the hollowness inside somewhat bearable.

"Are you ok? Do you need blood?" came her quiet shaky voice and he shook his head, not trusting his own to hold steady right now.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have provoked her like that" she whispered, closing her eyes against the frustrated tears that were threatening to spill and she drew him closer to her, her arms wrapping easily around his form as the wound in his stomach finally began to heal. Silently communicating how glad she was that he was alive, that he was here, that there was hope for the bond that they'd both tried to break. That they could start to rebuild the damaged trust between them and It was then, as they both sat huddled on the floor amongst the debris that he noticed the way that her entire body was trembling. He frowned and raised one hand, letting it enclose on her forearm and he squeezed it gently; the only act of comfort, or forgiveness that he could currently provide and watched in mild fascination as his blood stained the pure white of her dress.


	5. Chapter 5

**Once again thank you for all of your wonderful comments. I absolutely love reading them and they motivate me to write (I've finally gotten back into the swing of things again) so please keep them coming! I'm glad no one was opposed to the idea of dropping the season 2 storyline. I'm actually looking for a beta to read through for typos more than anything else, so if any of you are interested please let me know! I try my hardest to catch all of them but I'm sure that some errors are still slipping through. Onto the next update: **

It was then that Stefan finally decided to show up at the boarding house, his keen senses immediately picking up on the tangy scent of blood and he raced into the great room, his frantic eyes settling upon the scene before him.

Elena was still huddled over Damon, holding him to her protectively and his movements immediately stilled. She turned her face slowly and looked up at him, not loosening her embrace and his stomach began to clench uncomfortably as he took in her glistening cheeks; her shaking hands, his brother's jaw tensed against the mind-numbing pain, the amount of blood that had threaded it's way into the silk of her beautiful dress…

"What happened?" he asked quietly, his heart already screaming the answer to him as his brows furrowed further at finding them both here together… somehow he wasn't as surprised as he should have been.

"Katherine" was all she could say, vacantly looking in his direction as Damon gingerly pressed a hand to his stomach, examining the area to make sure that there were no splinters still stuck in his skin.

"We can't keep doing this Stefan" Elena whispered, letting her eyes drop to stare avidly at his shoes – anywhere but his face. If she didn't she wasn't sure that she'd have the strength to say what needed to be said.

"This plan isn't working; we all know she wont leave without getting what she wants" she paused and took a deep breath before meeting his tortured expression, her eyes strong and determined as she continued.

"We have to kill her. It's the only way"

His stilted silence spoke volumes about the distance that had grown between them. She remembered a time when she'd have flung herself into his arms as soon as he'd stepped into the room, leaving Damon's side without a second thought. A time when none of this would have happened because she'd still be dancing the night away with him; a time where he never lied to her and she never lied to him.

That didn't exist anymore.

"She's right Stefan" Damon finally spoke, beginning to straighten now that the worst of the pain had passed and it was then that Elena let her hands slip away as he stood, extending his to help her up. She took it easily as he pulled her up gently and grimaced as she looked down at her ruined attire, not missing the way that neither of them let go.

Stefan swallowed thickly and nodded, the movement stiff and jarred.

"I know… I just – I don't know _how_" he finally admitted, running a hand roughly through his hair as Damon gave him a knowing look and Elena one full of sadness because she was fairly sure that she knew too. He still felt something for _her_. She bit down on the anger and hurt that was threatening to overwhelm and instead concentrated on taking calming breaths.

"I guess that's where I come in" Damon answered easily, sarcasm and indifference _finally_ in tact again as he glared at his brother. They wouldn't be in this mess if it weren't for him. They should never have come back to Mystic Falls in the first place, but it had been Stefan's determination to convince Katherine to leave _without _using violence that had promoted Damon to take matters into his own hands.

"We should have killed her the minute she came back" Damon hissed angrily, refusing to break eye contact with his brother even though Elena's eyes burned holes into the side of his head.

"Yeah, and how to propose we do that? Incase you haven't noticed she's got _centuries_ on us" Stefan spat just as angrily losing the old age battle with his temper slightly. The night had been disastrous and he could only see it getting worse. He was tired, _so_ tired – of everything; of feeling so conflicted, of lying, of not being able to hate.

"Well _talking _sure didn't do a damn thing did it?" Damon retorted, finally dropping Elena's hand and stalking towards his brother.

"Come on, this isn't helping" Elena sighed in exasperation.

"Well it needs to be said" Damon snapped, now standing toe to toe with him.

"Stefan" Elena warned, moving forwards to physically place herself between them as she saw him start to clench his fists wincing at the feeling of the congealed blood that was coating her legs and bare feet.

"You can fight each other later, I don't care but right now, we need to figure out what we're going to do about the moonstone" she continued, giving them both measured glares and watching as some of the tension eventually seeped from their bodies.

* * *

_Damon cracked an eye open as soon as he heard the front door click signalling Katherine's departure, the day had barely surpassed twilight leaving the vast expanse of Katherine's bedroom cast in a pale blue light and the expensive cotton of her bed sheets rumpled and slipped easily from his skin as he sat up, immediately setting to work. _

_He pulled his discarded jeans from the previous night on buckling them quickly before moving towards the vanity, pulling the draws open carefully inspecting their contents. He knew she kept it in the room somewhere; he just had to find it. _

_After checking every drawer in sight, wondering the floorboards carefully listening for the sound of a hollow chamber, doing the same with the walls and the furniture he became frustrated with his wasted efforts, cursing as he flopped down on the bed again after reaching an impasse. Hew knew she wouldn't return for several hours; she'd always been consistent when it came to her schedule and he'd be lying if he said it didn't baffle him that after 150 years, she still fed in the "blue hour". He rolled his eyes and made his way to the bookcase, he may as well amuse himself as he waited for her to return right?_

_It wasn't until his eyes passed "The Merchant of Venice" that he stopped, his subconscious granting him pause as he mulled over that title… he frowned forcing himself to run through his many memories, like flipping through the pages of a worn book. There was a reason his gut was telling him to stop; there __must__ be a reason, he just needed to find it… after several moments of careful consideration it dawned on him. _

_She liked this book. _

_He narrowed his eyes recalling the scene as if it had occurred just one day ago. _

_She'd quoted it in the early hours of the night, as they lay entangled beneath his sheets – sated and worn, her silky voice wrapping over the words seductively as she'd told him of the many wonders of the world, of her time in London._

"_All that glisters is not gold_

_Often have you heard that told_

_Many a man his life hath sold_

_But my outside to behold"_

_He smirked and pulled the book out opening it, knowing before he did that he'd find what he was looking for. He chuckled humorously as he started down at the moonstone tucked snuggly into the square hollow that she'd cut into the pages. _

"_You're loosing your touch Katherine" he remarked before pocketing it and returning the book, satisfied smirk firmly in place._

* * *

"Have you figured out what it does yet?" she asked quietly now that they were sitting in a more civilized manner by the fire again. Damon shook his head before speaking.

"Bonnie's still doing the research but my best guess is that it somehow allows the holder to control any given pack of werewolves; we just need to figure out how to activate it" he explained.

"Even so, there's no way that we can give it to her" Stefan interjected, he was sitting next to Elena on the couch with his elbows resting on his knees, hands clasped together in front of him as he stared at the fire.

"Stefan – she threatened Damon. What choice to we have?" Elena bit out tersely, glaring at the side of his head as he refused to look at her and for some reason he just couldn't stop the taut remark from slipping from his lips.

"And that's now become a problem? You wouldn't have said the same thing three days ago" he pointed out, voice drawn and tired. It was true, three days ago she was still avidly seething, spewing hateful words about his brother whenever she had the chance; when she saw him in passing at the house, the Grill, various social events. Even then he'd realised that it wasn't possible to hate someone so passionately yet still be effected by the things that they do.

She stiffened considerably and dropped her gaze as Damon rolled his eyes.

"He's right. Let the bitch come, I'll be ready for her" he answered easily, finishing the rest of his glass of scotch with a flourish.

"_No_" Elena huffed, raising her eyes and meeting his in a blaze of fierce passion, his eyes narrowed slightly and he quirked his head to the side as he studied her.

"You have a better plan?" he challenged and she nodded.

"Give her a fake. Get Bonnie to spell another stone and we'll keep hold of the original" she spoke decisively and he took a moment to consider her proposal.

"I thought we'd learned our lesson from the last time we asked _her_ to spell something for us" he pointed out immediately.

"She'll do it this time. _Everyone_ will suffer if Katherine gains even more control over this town" Elena argued easily, crossing her arms and raising her eyebrows slightly to try and accentuate her logic.

"And you think Katherine won't notice the difference?" He replied his voice a mix of skepticism and sarcasm and it was only then that she faltered; that the briefest flicker of uncertainty crossed her features before she got herself under control again.

"I think it's better than the alternative" she said carefully, her eyes pleading with him to just _listen_ to her, to understand that she wasn't willing to lose him. That she wasn't going to let him sacrifice himself without a fight. Eventually he conceded begrudgingly, still not entirely convinced by her plan.

"_Fine_. I guess you better call the witch" he said giving her a false smile before pulling himself from the chair easily and leaving the room. Her hearing let her know that he was headed upstairs as the old wooden floorboards protested under his weight.

After the proverbial dust had settled on that confrontation she sighed, placing her head in her hands letting the tension slowly seep from her body. The turmoil surrounding all of them lately was driving her insane. The lies – they were torturous, she was hiding things from everyone and they were hiding things from her too, present company included. After several minutes of careful deliberation she came to the conclusion that the silence was _killing_ her; she couldn't do this anymore, this walking on eggshells whenever she was around Stefan. Avoiding any topic that might lead to the awkward silences that seemed to stretch on for days between them now, _no_. She was done with hiding, with dishonesty. She turned her head to the side slightly, taking in his foreboding expression and flung herself off the proverbial cliff.

"I saw you… with Katherine" she whispered quietly and Stefan _finally_ turned his head to meet hers, his eyes a storm of barely suppressed emotion; anger, guilt, regret, _pain._

"I know you kissed Damon" he answered just as quietly and she shivered slightly because his tone, instead of being angry, or full of jealousy, was one of acceptance and she swallowed tightly, nodding slowly once in acknowledgement of his statement, unsure of what she should say; what she should do so she said the only thing that came to mind.

"I'm sorry" she bit out earnestly, emotion nearly cutting off the words as she spoke and his lips quirked into some kind of sad smile.

"Me too – I guess I saw this coming" he answered quietly and she frowned shaking her head.

"I didn't plan this…" she started only to be cut off mid explanation.

"Not you, I meant _me_. I should have known the minute she came back that my judgement would be compromised… that I lacked the kind of _clarity_ that Damon has about his feelings towards her" he explained quietly and her eyes widened slightly in understanding of his unspoken confession.

It reminded her of the stone cold sensation of putting on a smile. Of saying _"I'm fine"_ when all you want is for someone to look deeper and say _"No. You're not"_.

"I thought we could do this Stefan – I thought our love was strong enough" she cried, her voice somewhere between a plea and resignation because it was now that she realised that they _couldn't_.

He reached out and cupped her cheek, wiping the tears that were falling slowly down her face away with the pad of his thumb.

"I thought so too and I want you to know that none of this is your fault…" she shook her head closing her eyes and trying to turn away from him, wracked with overwhelming guilt, but he forced her to look at him again.

"_No_ – you need to listen to me Elena. This _isn't_ your fault. Things happened that were out of your control and I need you to understand that there's nothing you could have done to change them. I'm to blame for my own actions… It's... that's not the first time we've kissed. And every time I just kept telling myself that it was all part of the lie, that I was doing it because I needed her to leave, that somehow it would help and I just – I'm so confused right now" he spoke vehemently his expression one of exasperation and desperation as he pleaded with her to understand. She blinked rapidly; his words almost rendering her speechless save for the one question that had been branding her from the inside out for _months_.

"Are you in love with her?" she chocked out, her voice barely able to carry the words as the precedence of what he was telling her set in and he shook his head.

"No" it was firm, decisive and she hated the way that her heart leapt at that statement because she believed him. She did… that was until he continued to speak.

"No – I could never be with her again Elena. _Ever_ – but I can't deny that I'm susceptible to her. I'm not above her corruption, _I'm_ not stable when it comes to her" he explained, the irony of his confession lost on neither of them and that's when she felt the last remnants of her hope for their relationship truly rupture and break.

She felt like she was stuck between starring at him in horror because he'd just confirmed every single one of her worst fears and the mind-numbing urge to scream at him.

The seconds pressed on in a silence so loud that it deafened before she exhaled the long breath that she'd been holding, pulling his hand from her face slowly and standing. She couldn't even form coherent words that would adequately express what she was feeling so she simply shook her head once, mouth parted slightly in shock before walking numbly towards the front door. Her legs carried her shell-shocked disposition shakily until she found herself sitting on the front steps of the Salvatore porch, knees drawn to her chest and arms clasping them to her desperately as she stared mutely ahead.

He loved her. He loved Katherine. He _loved_ her.

The door clicked softly behind her and she didn't need to turn backwards to know who it was. She knew he'd heard.

"Just take me home Damon" she asked quietly.


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you all for your wonderful reviews last chapter and throughout the story, I've got a clear direction for this fic now (finally after months of thinking!) so writing it should become easier. Thank you to everyone who offered to be a beta, I appreciate it so much. I'd like to thank LovexAndxFate for your work on this chapter! Here's the next update:**

He expected crying, anger, frustration. He expected _something _from her but all he was currently getting was resolute silence coupled with an utterly blank expression and to be honest, it was beginning to unnerve him.

She hadn't uttered a single word since he'd retrieved her shoes for her and let her into the car, biting back the comment about not getting blood on his seats; he was a bastard but not _that much_ of a bastard. He wouldn't berate her whilst she was already so clearly down. And he didn't like the fact that in the back of his mind he knew that he'd do _anything_ to see her smile again – including trying to get his brother out of the doghouse. He supposed that was how they'd ended up in their current situation.

It was like a bad case of déjà-vu; him sat on her bed lost in contemplation, her just coming out of the bathroom having showered and dressed and within a second he was propelled back to that night. That night when he'd almost killed Jeremy. He swallowed the uncomfortable lump in his throat and looked up at her as she held up her dress.

"What am I going to do about this?" she asked quietly, the first words she'd uttered to him in over an hour and he blinked a few times, trying to understand what she meant.

"I can't just put it in with the wash, Jenna will see it" she explained a tired and defeated sigh leaving her body before she walked over to the bed, taking a seat beside him.

"I'll take care of it" he said softly, taking it from her hands and placing it on the bed on the other side of him.

She looked up slowly until she was staring him in the eyes, seeing him; _really_ seeing him for the first time in _months _and in that moment she was overcome with memories. Recollections of every time he'd stepped up to help her and every time he hadn't; every time they'd laughed together and every time they didn't. Every time she'd _felt_ for him and every time that she wouldn't. _Couldn't_.

She thinks in those quiet minutes, in those stolen seconds between them, where he allowed her to see _everything;_ every pain he sincerely regrets causing her that the first brick of trust (the one that had somehow refused to budge) is restored.

"_Thank you_" she said sincerely, refusing to break eye contact and they both know that they've come full circle. From hate to friendship backto hate and now, now they're taking the tentative steps towards friendship again. Towards _them_, even if neither of them realises yet.

"You're welcome" he says quietly with just the right amount of uncertainty in his expression, in his voice, to make her further regret keeping him at arms length for so long. Her apologies are worn however, he's heard it all before and she's sure that he doesn't want to hear it again – he wants her to show it. _Needs_ her to show it, so instead she gives him one last meaningful look, a small nod before blinking her eyes and severing the connection.

"Jenna and Jeremy should be home soon" she says, and she feels the way his shoulders slump slightly in defeat**, **knowing that this is his cue to leave.

"Ok" he nods, his hand enclosing around her dress before he stands easily determined to make his way to her bedroom door without looking around to see her again, but he's weak. _So_ weak when it comes to her and he turns, compiling his thoughts before reaching out to her again, offering whatever small comfort he might provide because he _hates_ to see her so lost.

"You know, she would have come back anyway" he starts quietly, trepidation evident in his tone as well as his expression and she frowns in confusion.

"I don't…" she begins but he cuts her off before she can say 'understand'.

"Katherine."

The frown doesn't leave her face but he sees the way her eyes register comprehension, he sees the internal battle that wars inside of her troubled head. It's as if she _wants_ to punish herself, as if she's scared to hear his words because she knows that they're true. Even if she'd done the right thing upon learning that Stefan and he were Vampires by sending them away, by placing as much distance between herself, her family and _them_, it wouldn't have been enough. These events had been set into motion centuries before she was even born. She knows that, she _knows_ that he's right but she wouldn't be her if she didn't at least try. Well - _she needs to hear it _he thinks.

"Regardless of you and Stefan. Even if you'd never met - we were always supposed to come back, it's our _home_ Elena…" he paused, his expression a myriad of conflicted emotions before he continued.

"I'm saying that if you need someone to blame for this, if you need someone to hate, blame us, blame Katherine; because this isn't _your_ fault" he states solemnly and she swears she hears his voice waver slightly, and before she can form a response he's gone.

He misses the way his words colour her shocked, he misses the way that _his_ words are enough to bring her out of inaction, sending her crawling up the bed to grab her pillow before sobbing earnestly into its fabric. She cries for Stefan, for everyone that died when they shouldn't have, she cries because she's heartbroken and because she's broken his… _theirs_ she amends. She cries because her life isn't fair and she just wants it to stop but most of all, she cries because she can't stop asking herself _why_ she didn't realise his capacity for selflessness before and that's not the question that she _should_ be asking herself right now.

He lingers in the shadows a few hundred metres from her house and listens to her muffled sobs, wonders if she realises that he's been here all along? _Every-single-night_ he found a way to be there; undetected and unmissed by Katherine. Just to make sure that should she decide to break the rules of their truce and come after Elena she'd at least have one line of defence. He thinks something breaks inside of him and if he hadn't been sure before, he knows now. Katherine will _die_. He'll see her burn in hell, even if he has to damn himself to an eternity there as well. He clutches the dress with an angry fist letting the anger wash over him turning his options into the comforting clarity of black and white. This or that; life or death, clean cut and simple. There is no more grey regarding his feelings towards Katherine, it's just a pity that he can't say the same for his brother.

* * *

She doesn't see them until dawn has broken, bringing with it the dying remnants of summer. It's mid September and she hates that the past four months have passed so quickly. She sits by the window surveying parents frantically trying to hurry their children off to their Saturday clubs as they run around carelessly, laughing freely without a care in the world and she's struck with a longing so deep that it startles her. It's a longing for normalcy and innocence. It rocks her to the core. She's been so immersed in the supernatural world since Katherine's return that she's almost forgotten that there are still thousands of people in Mystic Falls who are blissfully in the dark, who knownothing of Vampires and Witches. Of werewolves and doppelgangers. She allows herself those moments of resentment before she forces herself to pull it together, to stop wallowing in self pity because she knows it will get her nowhere and pushes herself away from the window resolutely.

When she walks into the boarding house Bonnie is already there, standing with the grimoire held possessively to her chest between the two facing red sofas. Stefan is sitting on the left looking a little worse for wear and Damon on the right, his expression one of annoyance as he and Bonnie glare at each other with hatred. She senses that his patience is wearing incredibly thin with the witch and she gulps slightly because things have never felt so awkward when she's been here before. Her feet propel her into the room fully and she takes a seat, not realising until three sets of eyes fall upon her that she'd chosen to sit next toDamon and she can no longer pretend that things aren't changing. They've been in this position before, the last time she recalls was before they went to Duke**,** but this is the first time that she's chosen _Damon's_ side over Stefan's.

She averts their questioning looks**,** ignoring them completely and gets straight to the point, the sooner she can leave the better because she doesn't think that she can stand Stefan's persistent and wounded expression.

"Do you think you can pull it off?" she asks Bonnie quietly and the young girl snaps her attention from Damon to her, a tight expression that she seems to constantly wear written on her features and she relents giving a sharp nod.

"Grams actually kept a moonstone in the house, it's not spelled but I think I can replicate the feel of it" she explained.

Damon gave a tight and sarcastic smile.

"And how are we to be sure that you'll actually do as we ask this time?" he asked and she rolled her eyes.

"You'll just have to trust me" she snapped back with as much ferocity in her gaze.

"Trust you… _right_" he scoffed, shaking his head and regarding her with a hateful expression.

"He has a point Bonnie… You know how dangerous Katherine is; this isn't just Vampire**s'** lives at stake, it's _everyone's_" Stefan implored, searching her eyes to try and find the truth. Bonnie bit her lip and nodded again.

"I understand I know what's at risk here" she said raising her eyebrows to convey her seriousness and Elena smiled slightly in acceptance.

"We're trusting you to do this" she started and Damon shot her a disgusted look.

"Speak for yourself… look, can you just get on with it, places to be, people to see; you know how it works" he said with false enthusiasm and Bonnie bit back a very frustrated sigh before opening the book, setting it on the coffee table pulling Grams' old stone from her jean pocket.

"I need the real one" she stated, scanning the page intensely again to re-familiarize herself with the spell.

Elena turned to Damon as he looked at Bonnie with narrowed eyes.

"Damon…?" she prompted, and after a few more seconds of deliberation he took it slowly from the front pocket of his leather jacket placing it on the table next to Bonnie's.

She chanted softly under her breath with her eyes closed in concentration for a few moments before opening them again suddenly.

"It's done" she said simply, shutting the book abruptly

"That's it?" Damon asked sceptically. "The flickering lights last time, that was just theatrics?" he deduced easily, his tone tight with barely restrained disdain and she rolled her eyes.

"Yes" she said easily, giving him a sickly sweet smile that lasted a fraction of a second before her face deadpanned again.

"And what did you do to it?" he continued, crossing his arms and leaning back to rest more comfortably on the pillows.

"When she activates it, her powers will be weakened" she said confidently, picking up Emily's grimoire and holding it to her chest again.

"See that's funny because we don't even know _how_ the other one is activated let alone what it does" he said, dropping his arms his eyes suddenly becoming predatory as he stared her down. She had to fight the chills that rushed up her spine as she recalled the way his teeth had ripped at her skin, she wouldn't grant him the power of knowing that her fear would always linger.

"Actually, my research cleared some things up" she answered tersely, raising her chin in a defiant manner.

He scoffed, raising his eyebrows.

"Really? And you're just _now _deciding to mention that little fact?" he shot at her, his indignation rolling off of him in waves.

"_Bonnie_" Elena chided, disappointment shining through loud and clear in her tone as she regarded her friend with a wounded expression. They'd talked about this; it was _supposed_ to get better! She was supposed to stop doing this, twisting things – she'd _promised_. She at least had the decency to look a little put-out but that didn't stop her from ignoring her, fixing her hateful gaze upon Damon instead and glossing over the reasons for withholding the knowledge.

"You were right**;** Emily spelled it to give the holder control over the wolves. You can only activate it using the blood of the current holder, in other words, you need Katherine's blood" she stated simply her voice attached and aloof.

"Why Katherine's, I have the stone not her" he queried, turning it over in his hands with curiosity.

"No, you _stole_ it from Katherine. It has to be _given_ to hold its power, it's a _gift_" she explained and he pursed his lips, before nodding slowly as if he were agreeing with himself over something that none of them were privy to.

"Should be easy enough don't you think _Stefan_" he quipped, an unsettling smirk playing at his lips as he fixed his brother with a knowing stare that made him want to shuffle uncomfortably. He knew _exactly_ what Damon was insinuating and if there had been any doubt in anyone's mind, his next words cleared things up for them.

"I'm sure she's _dying_ for a little blood play with you; it always was her favourite thing to do the kinky little bitch" he said tightly, his hatred pouring out of him like venom.

Elena stiffened visibly beside him, hurt and sadness swimming within her eyes as she looked to Stefan and the guilt that was evident all over his face.

"You don't need me anymore, I'm done here" Bonnie spoke harshly, disgust colouring her features as she regarded the scene before her. It made her sick that Elena immersed herself willingly in _their_ world. A lifetime of friendship wasn't enough to change that fact and that was why she was cutting her ties now. As soon as Katherine was dealt with she needed Elena to make a choice, her or _them_, and it saddened her to know that the battle was already lost before it had begun. There was no way that she'd walk away from the Salvatore's; not now, not _ever_.

Stefan's expression remained tight, his words temporarily lodged in his throat because he just didn't know what to say. Damon frowned with a look of false concern as he peered at him.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Did I say something that makes you uncomfortable?" he taunted, quirking his head to the side and leaning forwards to rest his elbows on his knees. He sighed and shook his head.

"Damn, I guess I kind of have that effect" he mused, drawing his lips into a regrettable line before standing easily.

"I guess I'll just leave the two of you to hash it out?" he continued merrily, tossing the stone into the air before catching it easily with a flourish before smiling widely at his brother and leaving the room.

Elena remained still, her expression blank. She couldn't even bring herself to start analysing the shift in Damon's mood – not yet. All she could concentrate on was how strange it suddenly felt to be sitting there with Stefan. They hadn't even been broken up for a day and it already felt like months… and somewhere in the back of her mind a voice said "that's because it _has_ been months". They should have ended things before it all became too complicated, they should have ended things when Katherine asked, because maybe; just maybe then she'd be able to see a way past this.

"Elena" he started and she shook her head sharply.

"Just don't" she bit out, her tone a lot more hostile than she'd originally intended.

"Do whatever you need to do to get Katherine's blood and once she's dead, we can figure out whatever is left of us" she continued, her tone clipped and relegated to formality not waiting for a response before she forced herself to stand and leave the house.


End file.
